How to get your boring car into the Christmas spirit

Those reindeer antlers were cute the first time I saw them. With the big red Rudolph nose on the grill, they almost made a crossover SUV look like a giant rolling reindeer head. Almost.

Those reindeer antlers were cute the first time I saw them. With the big red Rudolph nose on the grill, they almost made a crossover SUV look like a giant rolling reindeer head. Almost.

Those reindeer antlers were cute the first time I saw them. With the big red Rudolph nose on the grill, they almost made a crossover SUV look like a giant rolling reindeer head. Almost.

Now that I see them on roughly a dozen cars a day… It’s old. Stop. You need something different.

How about a tree?

Yes, people carry trees strapped down horizontally on their cars all the time. But those are only there for transport. They don’t have lights.

How about a 2.5-foot tall tree that sticks straight up from the roof of your car complete with colored lights that shine at night? This is what you want. It’s artificial tree, of course, so the needles won’t blow off on the highway. (Well, maybe a little.) It’s engineered to withstand the rigors of a whole season sticking straight up off the roof of a moving vehicle.

So, how much does an amazing tree like this cost?

$130

I understand your reaction. Take a moment to wipe the coffee off your screen. $130 paid to ChristmasCarTree.com does sound like an awful lot for a car-bound holiday centerpiece. You have to understand the engineering involved, though.

You could just duct-tape a toy tree to your car but that would, first of all, probably damage your paint and, second, it could fly off to hit another car or a hapless pedestrian.

This tree is held firmly to the car by four suction cups plus four cloth straps ratcheted tight to the door frames. It’s not going anywhere. But it can be folded down to fit under low garage roofs.

Still, $130 is a major commitment to making your car look Chistmasy

There are plenty of cheaper but similarly non-hazardous options out there. There are always grill wreaths. You can buy one of those from Party City for about $15.

There is also a whole universe of Yuletide vinyl cling-ons and magnets. There are Chistmas-light shaped ones that go all around the car, ones shaped like elf legs designed to look some poor elf got gruesomely caught in your tailgate — funny, if you’re not an elf — and more religious ones showing silhouetted nativity scenes.

Or you could do what a lot of other people do. Buy a real Christmas tree, stuff it inside your car for the drive home, then have the smell of Christmas for weeks after you unsuccessfully try to vacuum up all the pine needles.

That’s what I always do.